Veggie Therapy

With all this gushing I’ve been doing about contentment lately, like here and here, I was a little caught off guard by yesterday’s semi-meltdown.

This past weekend we went back to St. Louis to celebrate the life of the handsome hubby’s grandma. It was a short trip, but jam packed with family time and even a stop by the home church. Since recently I’ve been feeling pretty good about life in general and Chattanooga specifically, I wasn’t prepared for the crash that came yesterday (our first full day back in town). To be frank, it sucked. There were tears and at the risk of sounding even more dramatic than usual, an ache that wouldn’t go away. Which, I gotta admit is a bit of a bummer.  I thought contentment might drive the ache right out of town.  Not the first time I've been dead wrong.

However, I am pleased to report that I handled things differently this time. After recently discovering that I tend to stuff intellectualize emotions until they come spewing out like semi-automatic ammunition and wounding everyone around me, I decided to go ahead and experience the grief I was feeling. I gave myself a bit of time to mourn the fact that we had to come back here and leave family, friends, church, etc. back there. Then I picked up scripture and actually prayed for the ability to move forward, knowing it was never going to happen if I just relied on my own strength. Next, I got up, got dressed and worked on things around the house. And THEN went to Lowe’s to buy the supplies necessary to plant strawberries, tomatoes and an herb garden. And you know what surprised me? All of those things helped.



See, this winter, I was reticent to plant any veggies or herbs. I couldn’t get my mind around the fact that we might be in Chattanooga long enough to harvest and eat them. Surrendering to the fact that we probably will be was a huge step. Knowing that we most likely will be here all summer and all of the fall, I decided why not have home grown yummies to make life a little a sweeter? My little (unconventional) garden has become a kind of therapy.

It’s true as I write this now; I'm starting to feel the ache. Probably, I'm going to have to repeat some of the same stuff AGAIN to alleviate it. I guess I'm realizing that even with my new found contentment; there will be days that hurt.  The two are not mutually exclusive.



So, I planted strawberries and tomatoes this morning.